Self-esteem has to do with how you see yourself. It is from within you. Self-esteem can also be defined as how you see your worth and value.
We have to be careful that we don’t place our self-esteem and worth on people, jobs, a car, a house, marriage, friendships etc. What if we lose these things? Material things and people’s opinions should not be the standard we use in defining our worth and the worth of others. God rules in the affairs of men and whether we believe it or not He created the world and you. We are created in the image of God; do you know what that means? Your view about God will help you understand who you are.
We serve a God that is all powerful; therefore we have the power to decide on thoughts that come into our minds, how we choose to live our life and what standards we use to measure our life.
We serve a God that is loving in fact that is who He is, love. It means we have the capacity to love; I am not talking about the love between a man and a woman. I am writing about the God kind of love, which is unconditional. Only a person who has a relationship with God can give this kind of love. Most of the love we see is the human love, which is conditional.
The God that created us has said in His word that we are fearfully and wonderfully made so why do we so often prefer to dwell on the negative statements that are uttered to us? Because we tend to define our life based on other people’s opinions of us. People didn’t create you God did.
It is the beauty from within that radiates on the outside. Have you ever wondered why even in beauty pageants the contestants are also judged intellectually? it’s not just about the physical beauty.
How to have a positive self esteem
Pray and meditate on the word of God daily; when you pray and meditate on the word of God daily it changes your view about life. You don’t base your life on the statistics of people and society. It builds your confidence in the Almighty God and in return it gives you a high sense of worth and value.
Read books; knowledge is power, read books that challenge your life, books that inspire you to be a better person. Read books that speak to the challenge you are facing right now. If you are going through a relationship challenge read books on relationship, I recommend books by Michelle Mckinney Hammond. She writes about real issues on relationships using the word of God. If you are going through a financial challenge read books on management and finance etc.
Ask yourself “what motivates me”; asking yourself what motivates me gives you an insight into reasons for the choices you make in life. One thing that should motivate you is pleasing God and being a blessing to someone else.
If what motivates you is being popular, accepted, being better than somebody else, to make a man fall in love with you, to be ahead in the game, to feel macho and in charge, it means you are insecure. When you are giving the world your gift (your passion) and being a blessing to other people these things automatically come to you. When it all comes to you, you have to learn not to allow it control you.
Evaluate and work to improve yourself; evaluate situations around you, don’t have a victim mentality. Every situation whether good or bad has its lessons that you must learn from. A disappointment is not the end of the world, evaluate, learn your lessons then move on with your life. I remember when I lost my job suddenly I thought to myself how was I going to cope, I dwelled on the pain of my loss for a few weeks then I realized something, I had lost my job and there was nothing I could do to change the situation except get back up and move on to the next thing God has for me. When a door closes, there is always a window opened somewhere but if you sit down feeling sorry for yourself and blaming everyone you will never see that window.